I hope I never figure out who broke your heart

I haven’t been that good at updating on my life day-to-day but the rumours about Livejournal dying have made me want to document things even more (that, and the fact that my memory is horrible is becoming more and more apparent). I never saved the entries from the last Livejournal I had and I don’t remember the username or password so a big chunk of my life has basically just disappeared. It was probably all teenage angst but I’d still like to be able to look back on it in ten years. So now I’m attempting to copy and paste over 1000 Livejournal entries because I can’t figure out how to work that LjArchive thing. Goddamit.

 

Some things that have happened in the last few days…

 

I developed some photos from New Year’s Eve. A lot of them were too dark to be developed but here are a few that did and that I really liked. The one of Emma is my favourite. As she put it: “gotta love a cig and a bottle of warm champers at 7am”.

 

   

 

Jasmina turned 21. We started celebrations at her place with cheese, crackers and cake and then drove to Newtown for drinks at a quiet little pub I think was called Cooper’s. We took over the smoking room and got proper drunk. It was goooood. Jasmina and I had a heart-to-heart in the bathroom. haha. There was a bit of trouble on the way home but it got sorted out eventually and all was well. Fun times. (More photos here.)

 

  

 

I saw Tegan & Sara play. Thanks to The Dwarf, I went to their concert last night at the Enmore Theatre. It was reaaaaaally good. I’ll be writing my review soon so I won’t say much more here except that the crowd was ridiculously good-looking and I want Sara’s babies. Oh and when they played Nineteen I almost cried a few happy tears. I cannot believe I’m turning 20 soon. I’m not handling that fact all that well. But anyway, it was a lovely show and it’s so strange how funny the both of them are when compared to how sad their lyrics sometimes are. The supporting bands, The Jezebels and An Horse, were also really good. (Photos by ANNIE LY.)

 

 

 

I played basketball. Well, sort of. I threw the ball around a bit, barefoot, in a skirt, whilst smoking. I have skills to pay the bills, obviously.

 

Christmas happened. January 7^th was the Orthodox Christmas. Being a filthy atheist and all, I always dread these sorts of events. The upside was that my Canadian cousin Vlado came over for lunch so I got to sort of catch up with him and make fun of his accent.

 

I haven’t written anything other than a journal update or review in a long time, and it’s becoming really frustrating. I need something new, exciting, inspiring, motivational….and I don’t know what that is. I’ve been mostly having a good time. There have been new and interesting things in my life, and I’ve reconnected with old friends, and I’ve been having fun, and people from my ancient past have contacted me (people from Serbia) and still…..I feel like I have nothing to write. It’s really, really, very frustrating for me.

10th December

This is me attacking the Birthday Boy.

 

Wednesday

Wednesday was my friend Drazen’s 20^th birthday. It was also the day my Canadian cousin Vlado’s older brother Zoran came to Australia. There are three brothers, the sons of my dad’s brother, and Zoran was the only one I hadn’t seen since I was a baby and therefore too young to remember him. He’s about 30 now and he’s an artisteeee. It could be the age difference, or maybe just a personality clash, but I got along with Vlado much, much better. They’ve both gone to New Zealand now. They slept over at our place before my dad drove them to the airport in the morning. So I hung out with them during the day before heading over to Liverpool in the evening to see Drazen for his birthday.

 

I met up with Nenad at his place in the fucking ghetto (seriously, that area of Liverpool makes me feel like I’m stuck in one of those tales-of-inner-city-American-life movies), then we walked over to Black Rose where we met up with Nikola and Jasmina. Drazen’s family was having dinner and his annoying-beyond-words brother came outside to have a cigarette and insisted on sitting with us and questioning us like a teacher on what we’re doing. He made a snide remark about me being an Arts student. I didn’t make any comments but seriously…he’s one person that really shouldn’t pass judgment on others. Anyway. We ended up having a few drinks at Legends….which has been cleaned up and is now called Macquarie Hotel and is a shiny gambling hellhole really. Sasa, Mark George and Bodin joined us also. Then off to this little barbeque area behind Drazen’s building to smoke. Sasa left, we convinced Mark George to smoke weed, Bodin still refused (and refused to let me dress him up in tight jeans) & Nikola and I ‘officially’ started talking again! Fun times. Then we drove around a bit, ended up in some park in Carramar, Bodin and Mark George left, and we drove down to a lake in Lansvale. It was actually quite nice considering its location. Really quiet and peaceful and completely unexpected…I mean, a lake!

 

It was a good night.

      

Gonna live on science alone

    

 

I’ve been feeling down but I have ways of dealing.

 

Yesterday I met up with Kylar in the city and we went to American Apparel where he spent forever trying on clothes as I wished I’d been born a boy because their clothing is much better. Except for the heel-wearing girls get to do, but I’d wear heels even if I was a boy, and I don’t actually get to wear heels much now because I am a giant and also don’t really know how to walk in them. Anyway, the customers at AA bugged me a little but the employees are lovely, and Kylar bought green jeans. Then we had coffee at Bill and Toni’s, wandered around…I guess we wandered around a lot because I sort of lose track here and we end up at Jet…oh yeah, we went to get Kylar’s novelty lighter fixed but that didn’t really work out. We saw Albert so he joined us for a while at Jet. He was waiting for a friend who was an hour and a half late and we left a little after she arrived. Kylar went home to feed the cat and I went home to watch too much TV, then talk to Nenad until 3^rd Rock From the Sun was on at 1.30 in the morning, doing lots of sit-ups in between because I have lost my mind and think that sit-ups are the cure for everything. (Since 10^th November, I have done 1120 sit-ups and 450 crunches altogether. Go me!)

 

 

Today looked good to start with, then absolutely everything turned to shit rapidly, I did some crying, etc and then decided I had to make myself feel better or else, so I left the house in a hurry, went to the city with about $5 to my name & walked up Broadway giving my resume out (I am so desperate for a job I even gave my resume to that horrible Goth-by-numbers store near Easy Way). Then I walked further down to the University of Sydney where I met up with my sister and we walked to Newtown where she bought us Thai food for lunch and we wandered King St for a bit. By this stage I’d basically completely forgotten how miserable I’d been earlier. I just need to keep myself distracted. Then we went back to her uni, to her interesting but sort of depressing lab (it’s fascinating but spending long hours there would be horrible) where she finished an experiment. To my disappointment there was no fire, smoke, bubbling liquids…nothing. Science isn’t as fun as they make it seem on TV! Then we headed homewards, and she continued towards Liverpool to meet up with friends.

 

My Canadian cousin Vlado was at my house; he’d had lunch with my parents and so we hung out, talking, watching TV, etc. I found out he’s got a job at the same place Kylar works, so I warned him about it. Oh and then I got my grades and that sort of brought the good mood to new levels.

 

So the downside now remains that I am broke as a fucking joke, have no idea how to get any money, am on constant bad terms with my mother and my sister is going away for the weekend! But I’m ok and am seeing Die! Die! Die! & Ohana tomorrow regardless of the money situation…I’ll figure something out (dentist money, anyone?).

Exit light, enter night

These photos were taken with Malakai, my Canon EOS500.

My sister, Jelena, getting ready for her Postgraduate Ball. She hates having her photo taken so I had to sort of chase her around with the camera.

The sunset looked amazing one day.

ANNIE LY at the Newtown Festival

Me! Taken by Zig, I think.

Kylar being a trashbag in Victoria Park & Hyde Park.

Rude Boy showing us her new song & how booty shaking is done (with Jo).

Annie & Jo

My Canadian cousin, Vlado, at the Glebe Street Fair.

I stalk Annie a lot.

 

We need to talk, we need to talk, we need to talk

 

NO PANTS REVOLUTION

 

Yesterday was preeeeeetty rad. Annie and I went to the city where we met up with my Canadian cousin Vlado who is doing the backpacker thing across Australia. I hadn’t seen him for a little while and in that time he has managed to travel through the Gold Coast, Byron Bay and Nimbin and meet some Japanese Rastas who played Bob Marley songs on their guitars. We went to the Glebe Street Fair which was basically impossible to move through because of the crowds. There were a few interesting things but it really wasn’t very exciting. I made Vlado try Easy Way taro milk tea and once he did, he said he would never doubt me again. It is seriously like liquid cake. Soooo good. Then he went back to his hostel because he was sleep-deprived and we headed to Oxford St. I wanted to develop some photos but everything was getting ready to close by then so we went to Hyde Park instead where I read aloud from this fucking hilarious pamphlet I picked up at the Glebe Street Fair – “God’s Guide to Sex”. It’s so good I’ll be writing a separate entry here with my favourite bits from it. Let’s just say that this was one of the conclusions we drew from it…

 

Annie: So you know now what will happen the next time you pick up a joint?

Me: I’m going to have sex afterwards?

 

And they say drugs are bad for you!

 

Then we moved to another part of Hyde Park where there was a Christmas tree and lots of tourists looking really excited about it and taking awkward photos next to it. So I had to do the same… Annie and I came to the conclusion that we are incredibly offensive people and if anyone overheard our conversations, they would hate us. We have to censor a lot in everyday conversations with other people. “Yeah roll up your jeans; that’s attractive.”

 

I showed Kylar a photo of the Luhv Of My Life and he responded with “is that a man?” Bitch.

 

I think I’m getting sick again. My immune system hates me. The plan for this week is: work today; write essay before I fail History; hang out with Aleks and Anita, and also Kylar sometime; dentist and seeing Outrun on Friday; hang out with my sister on Sunday; figure out how to buy my sister a birthday present, my Girl Talk ticket and my Kings of Leon ticket, and pay back Annie for my Prodigy ticket – more shifts at work? Nooooo.

 

& finally…

 

You don’t fuck with The Fuck Whats. The Fuck Whats fuck with you.