unclean, a libertine

The World According to Ivana Stab

Thursday, 4th December 2008

with 3 comments


Continuing my recount of the last few days…


On Thursday I took acid for the first time. The day started at Town Hall where Annie & I met up with Kylar. Down to the Botanic Gardens, wandered around a bit, and then went to the Art Gallery. Maybe I’m not an appreciator of fine art or something, but I just tend to find the Museum of Contemporary Art a million times more interesting. Anyway. Then back to the Botanic Gardens, shared a joint, then I saw the clouds growing and shrinking and felt really good overall. Unfortunately Annie didn’t feel so good, so I got sort of snapped back to reality and it became a bit frightening, though the good thing was that time seemed so impossible and strange that even when I was feeling bad, it’d quickly disappear, then I’d remember the freak-out again, then I’d forget again, and so on. I’ve tried to explain how it felt but it’s pretty impossible. I guess I felt like I was in another world even though I was aware that I was still a part of reality. Or something.


It was a really strange, incredible, really intense, indescribable experience. I am really looking forward to experiencing it again! For hours we sat around the Botanic Gardens. Morgan appeared out of nowhere as well. I smoked Kylar’s filter-less Camels because we had no normal cigarettes. Those things are fucking impossible to smoke. Annie lost her hat ‘frolicking’ through the bushes. I was completely convinced that every single person walking nearby knew we were on drugs and I felt really seedy. But at the same time, I was really enjoying it and it was really lovely. I guess I alternated between complete ecstasy and oblivion, to sort of freaking out. I remember talking incessantly because that made me feel like I was still existing in the real world. On the train home I was writing my thoughts down and they went from sort of happy thoughts about reality/non-reality, to a rant about how disgusting humans are because I kept hearing disgusting noises on the train like people blowing their noses. Then I had to talk to someone – Annie was in her own world, Kylar and Morgan had stayed in the city, so I called Jasmina and as I was talking to her (more like, talking at her), I started drawing on my jeans without realising and when I noticed what I was doing, I knew I should stop because they are my good/favourite jeans, but I just couldn’t stop myself.


It was about 8 by the time I got home and because we’d taken it around 1, I figured it should have worn off by then, but it hadn’t and I had to be careful with the way I was around my family. The fact that I was convinced Jon Stewart was talking directly to me as I was watching The Daily Show wasn’t very helpful. haha. I couldn’t look in the mirror because my face looked strange to me. Attempting to shave my legs at 1 in the morning whilst still feeling out of it was an amusing experience – a bit of blood involved. Then I couldn’t fall asleep because I kept thinking about random things, with thoughts moving through my mind really quickly. I got a bit worried that it would never stop, that I’d damaged my brain. I eventually fell asleep and had a dream about being arrested for being addicted to ice…. When I woke up the next morning I was so relieved to be completely sober. Still, I can’t wait to try it again.


(A few more photos here.)


3 Responses

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  1. i think my water supply has been spiked with acid because i feel like that everyday ahahahaha!


    December 8, 2008 at 9:30 am

  2. Glad to hear you a good first experience – nicely described as well! Happy trippin’ in the future!


    December 9, 2008 at 8:59 pm

  3. Thanks! 🙂 Looking forward to it again.

    Ivana Stab

    December 11, 2008 at 5:43 am

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