unclean, a libertine

The World According to Ivana Stab

Archive for the ‘Copy & Destroy’ Category

Feels Like Friday, issue nine

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Writing about: trying to write; reality or lack thereof; boy(s); driving down the coast; identity through nationality; the usual. Short pieces of writing, mostly. Photos. Cut and paste. Made with love and angst. $2 or trade. Email ivanaforpresident@hotmail.com


Written by Ivana Stab

March 15, 2009 at 9:55 am


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I received this email the other day and it made me pretty happy:


 Hi Ivana,


elle from sticky here. I am really enjoying Feels Like Friday. please
keep it going. I really like your writing. and now I have a query for
I was wondering if it would be OK to use a scan of your work for a
powerpoint file to be submitted to australia council as examples of
the types of work that we (as an arts organisation) support.


Sticky have been very good to me and I am really excited to go to Melbourne just so I can hang out at the shop all day long!


Two new pieces of writing by yours truly are up on The Dwarf: my not-so-nice review of Iglu & Hartly’s album & Then Boom. Watch me turn “this is a pile of shit” into 350 words. Also, my fangirl rant about the Tegan and Sara concert is here.


Yesterday was a nice day. I dropped off some photos to be developed in Cabramatta (never, EVER will I develop photos in Liverpool again. Rabbit Photo charged me $18. My awesome people in Cabra do it for $12). Then I went to the city, obsessively listening to Alisa and Azra on the way. I wandered Basement Books and bought Junkie Love by Phil Shoenfelt which looks pretty interesting – the cover has a syringe and love hearts, and on the back is a quote from Nick Cave about liking the book, so…how could I resist? (Also, it was only $7!) Then I went to Hyde Park and was writing/reading/smoking/drinking coffee/minding my own business/waiting for Morgan, when this random dude with no shoes comes to talk to me. I figured he was just a random drunk who was bored, but then he says he was sent over to invite me to “join their party” and points to this group of people sitting on the opposite side, one with a guitar, one a hippie looking girl with glitter on her face, etc. I say I’m waiting for a friend and so he stays around to talk. He’s from Brisbane, has been in Sydney for a few months, slept in Hyde Park last night. Then Morgan arrives and Dave (I think was his name), the shoeless dude, continues talking to us, then the hippie girl (Elise?) joins us and they convince us to join them. So we sit with them for a while and they’re all random people that met each other that day in the park and have been ‘recruiting’ other people to hang out with them. It was so incredibly weird and random and funny. Morgan and I were a little anti-social so we didn’t talk to anyone except Dave and his girlfriend (I assume she was, anyway) because they kept talking to us, but the sunshine was nice and we hung around for a while before we left to make use of my ‘present’ of which we didn’t have enough to share with everyone. Then we smoked across from a church which made us feel pretty good. So we hung around for a while and discussed how amazing Josh Beech is, and then Morgan had to leave, and I wandered the city a bit more but it was a Sunday evening and everything was closed so I got some food and headed off.


I went to Liverpool where I met up with Jasmina and Nenad and we went to the cinemas, and with very little movie choice, watched The Day the Earth Stood Still which was SO BAD; it was hilarious. Keanu Reeves cannot act. At all! It was too funny.


Today I had to get up at 7.30 because I had a ‘job training’ appointment at 9. The only reason people go to job training is because they will stop getting their Centrelink money if they don’t. I don’t GET money from Centrelink so I realised it is completely fucking pointless for me to go. Oh and not to mention USELESS. The trainer is a condescending asshole who treats us like we are retarded and/or five years old. It was incredibly painful to sit through. I’m going tomorrow to ask them whether I can get money for going, and if I can’t, they can fuck right off. Seriously – he SHOWED US HOW TO USE A COMPUTER. He showed us an inspirational video then asked us comprehension questions. He says things like “ok so if you do three hours in the morning, then three hours in the afternoon, how many hours is that – anyone?” UGH. I wanted to shoot myself. But it’d probably be a better idea to shoot him.


I’m making Feels Like Friday #9. Yay!


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Thursday, 18th

Up early, lift to the city from parents who were driving to the fish markets, walk from Pyrmont to Town Hall…overly nice Red Cross money collector complimented my hair (and noticed it was dreadlocked…most people just think it’s a manic growth on top of my head) and my fork bracelet…met up with Kylar, coffee and cigarettes all over the place, Hyde Park and Bill & Toni’s and Hyde Park again….home, Slavica and Jasmina helping my mum cook for Sveti Nikola, but had to leave soon after I arrived…all day running around helping with whatever needed to be done around the house…late night Oz watching. Consumed five coffees and was still dead tired.


Friday, 19th

Sveti Nikola, my family’s Slava. I am horrible at getting into the spirit of things so I mostly hid in the living room and avoided all the guests who were in the sun room. I get really awkward every year because I rarely see a lot of those people, and there’s the confusion of whether I should just shake their hand or do I need to kiss them as well, and do I kiss them once or three times, and what the hell should I talk to them about, etc. Plus, every year someone makes a comment about me losing weight, which makes me wonder if I was obese as a child or something… Towards the end of the night I managed to get away with sitting on the couch and reading as most of the guests had left, my parents were with the older ones and my sister with her friends, and Jasmina had left – these days I have only a few Serbian friends, and those that I do have go to Nikola’s house because his Slava is also Sveti Nikola, and as they’ve been going to Nikola’s well before they met me, they of course still go there. Plus, everyone gets drunk there so it makes more sense anyway. Our house tends to be a bit quieter. Sveti Nikola reminds me every year, very blatantly, just how hard it is for my family to spend a day together and get along. The upside is waiting for midnight so I can eat chocolate.


Saturday, 20th



Kalaediscope fun; Emma; Kylie; Seeta & T-Nev; Katie & moi; Arex


During the day, Annie and I went to a small zine fair that was happening at the first Voiceworks launch to happen outside Victoria. It was nice. Small and kind of quiet, and the people that came along didn’t really seem to know what zines were, but it was chilled out; I mostly sat around reading and occasionally talking to the kids from Just Like Candy & the Black Rose Anarchist Bookshop (on Enmore Rd, Newtown). Afterwards we wandered around a bit, bought a present for Emma which was directly responsible for us speaking Engrish all day – part of the present was a Guns n Roses cigarette case. On the side it had a warning label against smoking but it said something like “cigarette smoke the harmful health”…what the fuck? So all day we were speaking Engrish – replacing every L with an R. “hero, may I have a rarge vanirra mirkshake?” Then I went home, frantically rushed around for an hour getting ready to leave again, then off to Scary Canary…which is a terrible venue but Up the Bracket happens there and it featured good people + vodka and therefore wasn’t horrible like the venue is. Good company featured: Emma (we were celebrating her birthday), Alex (Arex), Katie (ok just quietly, I’m sort of in love with Katie), Kylie, Seeta, T-Nev, etc. Seabas played a bit of November Rain – hell yeah! After a while we went to Emma’s (new) place which I really like. Stairs everywhere! Emma put on The Doors and packed a cone as soon as we walked in which made me very happy.  Katie asked me why I love The Doors and I really couldn’t put an answer into words – they are just so special to me. Bit of hanging around, being lazy, that sort of high when sitting on a couch with a blanket is just like the most perfect thing, then we wanted to watch That 70s Show but the speakers connected to the fancy-computer-TV weren’t working so instead we watched so-bad-it’s-good Stripperella on SBS, then something else I don’t remember, before we went to sleep.


Sunday, 21st



I woke up around 9.30 and Annie was already awake. We sat on the little balcony smoking – I really wanted to have a cigarette first thing in the morning because I can never do that whilst living at home! Then we wrote a note for Emma and left before her housemates, who we don’t know, got up to find two weird kids hanging out in their living room. Wandered the city in search of a pretzel (nowhere to be found!), then went home. I napped on the couch, watched Oz, and otherwise generally lazed around.


Monday, 22nd

Spent the day in a really unexpected unbelievably happy mood. I don’t even know why! I just feel good all over. Have lazed around in the sun, reading, listening to silverchair’s Live From Faraway Stables, Love, Alice Coltrane (the last two thanks to Kylar), dancing around the backyard like a character from Hair, discovering Gogol Bordello and reconnecting with my Eastern European roots with mad gypsy music. Good times.


(Photos by ANNIE LY.)

7th & 8th Dec

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Sunday & Monday





1. Emma & Alex

2. Seeta & T-Nev


Sunday was a lot of fun. Annie and I went to the city, photocopied and stapled lots of copies of TEETH LOVES STUFF #5, then walked all the way to Camperdown. We weren’t exactly sure of where the park we needed to be was, but we found our way there relatively easily. It was only the heat that was the problem – the weather people said it’d be cold so I wore my Docs and stockings! Also, it was raining so it was disgustingly humid. But anyway. We walked the very long journey to Camperdown Park where there was a zinester picnic happening. Emma, Alex, Seeta and T-Nev joined the picnic which was beyond awesome. Though we moved away from the rotunda pretty soon after arriving to smoke and we didn’t end up rejoining the circle because Annie was sick, etc. We had a little picnic of our own a bit further away, with a blanket and all provided by T-Nev, with Alex making up stories about a war for Rotunda World. It was fucking hilarious. Apart from the part about Annie being sick, it was a really, really nice day. I don’t get to hang out with those kids nearly enough. So many November Rain references! We’re going to re-enact the video clip and I get to be Slash. Oh yeah! & Alex and I are going to write a series of articles on the topic of Being a Wog With Big Hair. On our way home, Annie and I made a stop at Chinatown where I got the biggest munchies out of nowhere and bought lots of cheap delicious cakes. Good times! (Conclusion for the day: “Asian milk drinks are bad and the Backstreet Boys are good!”)


I don’t think I did anything on Monday…? Oh wait, no, I did 100 sit-ups. But seriously, I don’t remember doing anything else at all. I guess I must have stayed at home.

Damaged goods, send them back

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Lived through incessant cramps

Read Down and Out in Paris and London in the sun in my backyard

100 sit-ups and 50 crunches

Lots of work for TEETH LOVES STUFF #5



CD reviews for The Dwarf – Circlesquare (really good) and The Tossers (not so good)

Gig review for Faster Louder – Tim Freedman, happening tomorrow night

Make it through a night at The Vanguard without killing myself or anyone else

Rewrite article for Stiff Magazine

Add finishing touches to TEETH LOVES STUFF #5 and copy it

Post new band interview on the TEETH blog

Marry Stephen Colbert

Send zine orders/trades

Vacuum room

Find a job



Because I can do TEETH stuff all the time

Because Law & Order: SVU is always on TV


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This arrived in New Zealand today so now it’s safe to post it here without the surprise being ruined – mail I sent to Dee with a mix I, just quietly, think is some of my best mix work yet.


Straylight Run – Hands in the Sky (Big Shot)

Bjork (feat. Kelis) – Oceania

Tricky (feat. D’na) – Call Me

The Weakerthans – Without Mythologies

Die! Die! Die! – Whitehorses

Kicks Joy Darkness – Collapse of the Wave Function

MGMT – Weekend Wars

The White Stripes – I Want To Be the Boy To Warm Your Mother’s Heart

The Magnetic Fields – With Whom To Dance

Patrick Wolf – Lycanthropy

The Dandy Warhols – I Love You

Bloc Party – Selfish Son

Pulp – 97 Lovers


Speaking of mail, this morning I received a lot of zines and it was so good; it felt like back in the day when the only zines I knew of were from overseas or from elsewhere in Australia and the idea of zinester friends in person seemed so far-fetched, so I’d get really excited every time I got mail addressed to “Ivana Stab”.


I chopped off more of my hair yesterday and have started straightening the ends so it fluffs out more and curls less and it’s pretty rad.


Aside from the inconceivable pain caused by my menstrual cycle, today was a pretty good day. I had plans of going to uni to return some books but the thought of climbing up all those steps was just too much. All I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and clutch my stomach. I got to the city around 1.30 and hung out at Hyde Park reading zines – Brainscan #23 by Alex Wrekk is absolutely fucking amazing and everything I love about zines combined into the one well written, amazing-looking zine. I bought a World AIDS Day ribbon, leaving me with $1 in my wallet. The man that was selling them said “excuse me sir” before I looked up…then he apologised quickly. Hah. I was wearing yet another shirt stolen from my dad, though. The man has a much bigger wardrobe than I do and he’s got style! Then Kylar joined me and brought some tube of neon green goo which was apparently candy – didn’t look very edible and neither of us wanted to try it. Kylar also brought presents. Then Morgan joined us, bringing Panadol thankfully (which sadly didn’t end up helping at all). We hung around for a while, put Kylar’s present to use, though it didn’t really do much for me, then left Hyde Park because they wanted food, then wandered aimlessly before going into Red Eye where I saw lots of CDs I wanted to buy (although the one that really interested me was by a band I’d never heard of but loved the name – Agnostic Front! …also, why are bands like Cobra Starship and Fall Out Boy and Simple Plan in the Punk section…?). Then Kylar left and Morgan and I went to Hyde Park again where we ended up staying until 7, I smoked an entire packet of cigarettes and it was decided that I have to go to Mother Russia before moving out, and I can move out after I’ve discovered the meaning of life in the mother country. Yes!


I came home to realise mother has completely stopped talking to me and I have no fucking idea why. Something about how I’m not taking care of my health and don’t listen to her? Lollerskatez.  


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Alright, because I don’t have a job at the moment, I need to sell like 40 of my zines to get my haircut. Yeah, I know, $75 for a haircut, it’s insane. But I need to get rid of this thing living on top of my head. SO, you know what to do.

Written by Ivana Stab

November 29, 2008 at 7:48 am